Tattoos have gone beyond art and free expression to protecting the wearer in these litigious times. On his travels your Uncle Melon has photographed many women wearing signs and warnings either mandated by OSHA or suggested by their lawyers. We call them, Body Signs of the Times:

These instructions also work when you're filling up on gas.

I once learned this lesson the hard way with a lit cigar and a Tijuana hooker.

Except for the ass, the hair and the tan, I'd swear that was my wife.


In China, cleaning up after ass-play must be very important. How Victorian!


I hope she makes an exception for Penthouse Pets!


Warning! Labia minora freezes before Labia majora.


But do you get frequent traveler miles?


Yeah, but does she validate?


Nice tail on the beaver!


Some lederhosen and a bag of Ricola's and you're all set for those mountains.


This actually means "keep the vibrator downstairs, the frequency causes rips in my implants"


She's such a philanthropist, except it says "No Midgets" on her ass.


She's so stupid she thinks her tits are silcon, not silicone! She probably doesn't even know what a horta is! Where's my pocket protector? Mom!!!


Some altar boys wear their scars on the inside.

Not really a tat but in 9 months she can replace it with the vacancy sign





Copyright © UncleMelon.com