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GI Joe was my favorite toy: he killed gooks, could be dismembered, and came with a million pieces to lose.
Here's some of my personal collection.
Your basic GI Joe... with cerebral palsey. I hated those stupid plastic hats.
Marine Corps Joe getting ready to film a recruiting commerical.
Fighting soldiers from the sky
Fearless men who jump and die
Men who mean just what they say
The brave men of the Green Beret
If you're gonna go with the beret look, you might as well have a matching ascot. Remember those snaps. There were cool until they fell off.
For the special boy, Wall-Eyed Joe
Oh no, I'm lost in the grass and I hear a lawn mower coming this way!
We are the Daleks! Exterminate them! or "Wow, bad fire, let's stand here at a safe distance, huh?"
Inuit Joe (formerly Eskimo Joe, formerly Polar Bear Jockey Joe, formerly Snow Nigger Joe)
"If I wear my cap at a jaunty angle, perhaps 'Jerry' will allow me to proceed to camp for tea."
Killed by the VC and left hanging from a Christmas tree as a warning. Poor Joe!
Keeping the Marianas Trench safe from communism and he used to do battle with my brother's pink sea snake when we took a bath.
Gabe Kotter Joe serving one weekend a month at Fort Hamilton, Brooklyn.
What red blooded American boy didn't like to pose his GI Joe in the nude and take pictures of his flat little butt.
Now Joe is ready for anything - that flap of felt protects his privates (oh wait, he hasn't got any!).
Possibly-Asian Joe or they put too much ink in the eyebrow machine down at the plant.
Joe selling cutting boards on the Home Shopping Network in the 1980's.
Never leave a doll's behind!
Hey, did they use Davey and Goliaths's dad as the model for GI Joe? He must of cut his face during the sack race at the church picnic.
"I'll float better than you, 'cause I'm not weighed down by a helmet - ya big pussy."
Vinny and Chuck dressed up on a Friday night. Hey did they use Helen Hunt as the model for GI Joe nurses?
Special Forces Joe training young Al Qaeda suicide bombers to kill ruskies in the 1980's.
Its my worst nightmare! The nip isn't going to kill me! He's undone my belt and now he's unzipping my fly!
What red-blooded American boy didn't spend countless hours bringing imaginary A-6 Intruders safely home
"Making fun of my shoes, Fritz? Take that!" BLAM!
Lets go bust some trannie heads
"Crap, that machine gun nest has filled my chest full of holes. Good thing I was wearing my gay plastic hat. I can't wait to see the guy's faces when I drink a beer at the officer's club!"
Wow, what a cool tank commander's get up. Now I just have to wait for Hasbro to put out a GI Joe tank.
Disco Joe: check out the cool medallion - looks like Joe is an Aries!
Time to go grease up my Joes for the big show at the Holiday Inn down by the interstate. Have fun!
Do you know how to tell what kind of Joe you have? You look at his butt! A military review of man ass right over here.
Yeah, I know, we did it already, see Green Army Men. These are GI Joes and those were little green army men and next month we're gonna do a bunch of matchbox cars, OK?
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